There are many things that can deplete your energy: work, stress and relationships. Which makes it difficult at times to find balance and be happy. Trust me I know because I've been there myself. There is no denying that with more goals to accomplish we all have less and less time to invest in ourselves and this can have an impact on every part of our lives. The good news is that there are simple daily tips you can follow to protect your energy so can increase your overall wellbeing.
1. Choose what you're going to let into your life and mind
You have the power to decide what kind of energy you bring into your life. What are the things that make you feel excited and alive? What do you enjoy doing? It could be art, writing, cooking or anything else that makes you feel good when you do it. Your work is your calling and it should be something that makes you feel great when you do it. You should have a passion for it and never dread going to work or having to sit down and do it. If there is something that stresses you out and makes you feel bad about yourself then stop doing it! If there is something that gives nothing but misery then stop doing it!
2. Don't say yes when you really mean no
"When you say yes to things that are not aligned with your values and intentions, you lose energy."
Letting people down is never fun but there are times when it's important to say no. This protects your time, energy, and resources. When you say yes to things that are not aligned with your values and intentions, you lose energy. You will feel drained and resentful. You might feel like you don't have the time or resources to do everything that's being asked of you. You might feel tired and don't have the capacity to give your all to everything. That's why it's important to learn how to say no when it's appropriate, especially if someone is asking you for a favor that does not align with your values or intentions. Yes of course, sometimes saying no is hard because you don't want to hurt someone else's feelings or because you feel guilty saying no when they asked you for something (and maybe even told you how important this thing was). However, if saying yes means that you'll be compromising your own values then the answer has to be a No.
3. Maintain boundaries
When you set boundaries with someone, you're making sure that they know where your limits are, so they cannot cross them without offending you or making you feel uncomfortable. When you have good boundaries in place and you maintain them, you can feel more relaxed and comfortable around other people, because they are not taking advantage of your generosity or trying to manipulate you into doing things that go against your values or beliefs. Try these strategies to maintain your boundaries :
- Make a list of people who drain your energy and avoid them as much as possible. If you can't avoid them, set limits on how much time you will spend with them.
- If someone is taking advantage of your generosity and kindness, tell him or her directly that you don't appreciate it and how it makes you feel when they do that kind of thing.
- If someone is manipulating you by trying to guilt trip or make you feel guilty, tell him or her directly that he/she needs to stop doing that because it makes you feel uncomfortable and resentful toward him/her."
4. Take responsibility for yourself
"You are responsible for your thoughts, feelings and actions. You are responsible for your life."
Take responsibility for how you show up in the world. You have a choice in every moment of how you show up and what you do. You can be a victim or a victor. You are responsible for your thoughts, feelings and actions. You are responsible for your life. The sooner you accept this, the sooner you can start taking responsibility for yourself and the direction of your life. Taking responsibility means that you stop blaming others and start taking action to change yourself so that you can live the kind of life that you want to live.
5. Don't take things personally
I'm a big fan of the "Don't take things personally" advice. It's also one of the most difficult pieces of advice to follow. Especially when you're dealing with people who are close friends or family members because they've known you for years, they know exactly how far they can push before you get upset. They know what buttons to push, and they aren't afraid to use them against you. But understanding that many times people project their fears and insecurities onto others will go a long way in protecting your energy and maintaining your happiness. When someone intentionally says something to hurt or anger you, it's because they're speaking from their own pain. And even if they're saying something mean or rude, it doesn't mean that it has anything to do with you personally. It's just an angry reaction from their own pain and confusion. So don't take it personally! The next time you get upset over something someone says or does, ask yourself "Is this really worth my time?" If not, let it go and move on with your day.
6. Limit your exposure to the news cycle
"If you want to protect your energy, stop scanning for news first thing in the morning and right before bed."
It's hard not to feel like you're missing out when your friends and family are sharing breaking news and viral stories on social media. If you want to protect your energy, stop scanning for news first thing in the morning and right before bed. Why? Because news is designed to ignite fear and anger, which then triggers a fight-or-flight response that drains your energy and can negatively affect your mood all day or make it harder for you to sleep at night. Here are two ways to protect yourself from feeling overwhelmed by the news:
1) Try skipping social media for a day or two. You don't need to go cold turkey, just turn off push notifications so you don't see those alerts popping up on your phone screen all day long.
2) Don't read any articles that make you feel anxious or stressed out. Instead, try reading an article that makes you feel good, something inspiring or uplifting, before bedtime or first thing in the morning I'm sure can help put things into perspective for you.
7. Ask for what you need from others
"I soon realised not asking was the quickest way to added stress and burnout."
Asking for what we need is a simple concept but it can be difficult in practice. This was especially hard for me because I was in the habit of doing everything myself but then I soon realised not asking was the quickest way to added stress and burnout. As a society, we have been taught that it’s selfish to ask for what we need, and that we should put others first. We’re taught not to be too demanding or too needy. We’re taught to be polite and accommodating at all costs. In other words, we’ve been conditioned to believe that asking for what we need is bad for relationships and even worse for self-care. But here’s the thing: if you don’t ask for what you need from others, then they won’t know how best to support you and vice versa. It's okay if you say: "I need a little space so I can recharge," or "I need for us to talk about this later."
8. Take time for yourself, away from everyone else
You need space in which to restore yourself and recharge your batteries. When we are tired, we tend to become irritable and short-tempered. We lose our ability to concentrate and make decisions effectively. We also lose our sense of humour and ability to laugh at ourselves and at life in general. If you are feeling tired and low on energy, here are some suggestions that might help:
- Take a nap during the day
- Get enough sleep at night
- Exercise regularly (but not too close to bedtime)
Your energy is the fuel you use to get things done and guess what, no one's energy is infinite, and it's just going to hurt you in the long run if you allow it to be drained to zero. It's a precious resource that should be protected. All of these tips are ones that I practice regularly so I can ensure that I am protecting my energy, I hope these ways work for you too and keep you happy, healthy, and smiling. Also, let me know in the comments what are some of your best tips for protecting your energy?
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